Some observations

Have you ever noticed how HARD starting a "diet" or "lifestyle" change is?  Our minds rebel! 

But that looks so good...
But one nibble can't hurt...
I can always do better tomorrow...

Our stomach growls at the mention of a cookie, a piece of cake, that favorite fast food or restraunt item...It says "HEY FEED ME YOU NUB!!" constantly when we eat "normal portions".

But have you noticed that after a week or two, our bodies stop rebelling?  It adjusts to the new "normal size" amount of food we're going to put in our stomachs?  It's ok with us working out (though sometimes it still rebels when you find new muscles you didn't know you had". 

I've been doing this seriously, as in this is it Amber you're done being fat for one week, 3 days, and some 14 hours give or take.  Not much you say, right?  To me, that's a huge amount of time.  I'm one of those do it for a day and something goes wrong so I quit for 4 months kinda person when it comes to weight loss.  Getting back on the "bandwagon" is difficult for me.  This is evident in my stopping last year.  Granted, I did well for the few months I did it, lost like 20 pounds, but got upset and frustrated when I hit that first plateau I guess you can call it.  Wasn't really, I was still losing but I wasn't losing very fast and I think I just said fuck it to be frank.  So what makes this attempt different from that attempt?  My cooking.

If you'd told me two years ago I'd be losing weight by eating less and whatever I wanted, I'd have laughed at you and said you're on crack.  I don't tell myself "NO YOU CANT HAVE THAT ITS FORBIDDEN FOOOOOOD!"  But rather I indulge, and enjoy and savor the food and then move on.  Let me give you an example.  D sent me out to get him some lunch.  Well sent me out is a strong way of saying he was hungry and I was going out anyway so I picked him up some lunch from KFC at his request.  KFC, ironically is my FAVORITE fast food.  I grew up on that shit.  I'd eat that chicken every damn day if you let me and it was good for me.  Anyway.  So I was hungry by the time I got done running around getting stuff and pulled into the KFC.  I wanted KFC.  I CRAVED KFC!  So what did I have?  KFC! 

Now wait wait, before you blow your gasket and tell me how bad that food is and how I completely blew my diet, let me finish :)

I got the meal for the boyfriend and one extra strip added to his meal and his sides I got the one he wanted and a side of mashed potatoes (no gravy!) for me.  That's right, you heard me I had one chicken piece and one individual side of mashed.  My craving was satisfied for a mere 250 calories and about 8g of fat and I added some fruit when I got home and some steamed broccoli to make it a full lunch.  I can enjoy what I want within reason!  I am able and do make choices in my life that positively or negatively affect me.  Showing restraint in this sort of situation has built my confidence; however, not getting anything at all from KFC would have bogged my mind down as it complained about how badly it wanted to nibble some KFC!  I also made sure the boyfriend knew not to leave left overs, or to throw them away and not save them for later if he was going to have left overs.  No need for temptation right? 

I digress though.  I was going to talk about my cooking.  I am currently, as I type this post, munching on my dinner.  What's for dinner you ask?  Chicken Fried Rice.  Home made, and not really fried honestly.  I about 3/4 a pound (two chicken breasts) of chicken cut up pretty small and sauteed mushrooms and minced garlic with it in 1 tbsp of olive oil then added 2/3 (one full serving according to the bag) of frozen peas and 3 oz (1 serving according to the bag) of pre-shredded carrots and about 1/4 cup of green onions cut up to the mix and sauteed that all together for a little bit, then when the rice got done mixed it all in, added a smidge of soy sauce (I really need to get the lower sodium kind though, I will next bottle I buy) and walla!  Chinese food!  I then weighed (ON MY NEW SCALE /NOD NOD) how much the entire batch weighed and then weighed (AGAIN!) about 1/4 of that and that's my dinner.  My own customized chinese food without the frying it and it isn't half bad!  Though...I think it needs a little more seasoning next time, maybe I'll add a little more garlic, something to mess with I suppose :)

THAT my friends is why this go around is different.  Last time I spent a lot of time searching the grocery store for those perfect easy to make no fuss meals that were "good for me".  Ha!  They really don't exist.  They're chauk full of salt my friends!  I'm not like "OMG SALT NOT IN MY DIET" but I don't want an overabundance.  So I make my own food.  And yes, soy sauce does have salt, but I try to limit it, best I can :) 

Have you ever noticed when you're being "good" on your diet you stick to the outer edges of the grocery store or within the frozen veggies section/bread aisle for "your food"? 

I noticed it last night.  Granted I walked down every damn aisle looking for an ingredient that still eludes me, but that's a story for another post.  I went to Walmart last night in search of food for some recepies I saw online and also for my rice.  First place I stopped, the fresh food section.  Got the shredded carrots, the green onion, some fruit, some bananas (my new best friend!) and moved on to the frozen foods section where I picked up my peas and some premixed bags of stir fry veggies that are frozen that I can use when busy or don't feel like cooking but want to throw together some stir fry.  They come with prepackaged sauce but I doubt I'll use it.  Anyway...then I hit the meat section and got a TON of chicken on sale (I got 12 pounds of chicken for ~18 bucks) which I split into two breasts per ziplock bag and put them all in the freezer except the one pack I used today.  And then got a little red meat because I want to make some beef and broccoli and such in the next week or so, and then I perused down the outer aisle as I picked up cheese, yogurt, eggs, milk and some 100% orange juice.  The only "inner aisle" I hit was the soda aisle for my fix (I drink 2 per day now wut!) and the cereal aisle for some prepackaged instant oatmeal.  The rest of the "inner aisle" shopping I did was for the boyfriend and his snack needs.  As much as I'd love for him to lose weight with me, it's not his priority and me harping on him will do no good.  So until he's ready, I can only support him not gaining as much weight as trying to cook as good of meals as possible.  :) 

So that's what I'm doing.  Cooking at home more, making better for me with much more veggies in it meals, and trying to have some sort of portion control going on.  It's kind of stressful, in a way.  Especially if you have a home made recipe such as spaghetti and you're trying to figure out just how many calories DOES this little amount I have on my plate have in it?  But I found that if I figure out all the calories individually as best I can and then add it all together, figure out how much the whole shabang weighs and figure out how many servings I think it should be and split it up that way I come out at least a little better off.  And it gets easier over time.

I'm not really hungry or constantly thinking of food like I was the first few days.  I don't care what anyone says, going from eating like 2500 to 3k worth of calories down to 1600 to 1800 calories makes your stomach go WTF!  I'm exercising more.  I'm actually having difficulty eating my full 1600 calories (GASP).  But you know what, I'm satisfied after meals, I'm sleeping better when my knee and elbow isn't bothering me and overall I am getting into better shape and losing weight.

Here's to continued success!

Until next time.